Fun With Despair,
WHERE are your pornography reviews? Satan has risked his literal life two days in a row, giving himself GERD and tripling his A1C all the way to Post-Diabetes in the process to give us quality awful content, and yet you refuse to put your mind, dick, and prostate on the line in the same way. Do we need to enforce the Stir Rules and ban you until you start making content?
You see, your Garrison provides a very helpful resource for the community that I was looking forwards to. I need to know what pornography is good and which is bad so that I can impress my dates, and yet you keep holding out on us, and I keep looking like a fool and a CLOWN. How am I supposed to show them how cool I am if I can't even discuss the basics like what it means when someone's hips move on their own or what an ahegao is? Where else can I learn what terms like shooting ropes and squirting? How do I even use the eggplant and water emoji??? Where are the reviews????
I, and I would hope the rest of the community, am putting you on fucking notice right here. If you don't post any pornography reviews by the end of 2020, I am commandeering this Garrison, and not only will I step up my shitposting game and do it a hundred times better than you would, but I will also focus each review on comparing the male characters in each piece of pornography to you specifically and personally. And my first planned review is Sonichu.
The time is 10:30 Pacific Time on Monday, December 28th, 2020. Because I'm so nice, I'm going to give you the longest amount of time possible and time you based on Pacific New Year's. You have 3 Days, 1 Hour, and 30 Minutes until 2021, and 3 Days, 1 Hour, and 31 Minutes until my first article goes live and I begin accepting submissions as the new Gimmickeer. As an added incentive, if you publish your first review before the New Year, I will still publish my first review for Sonichu, but instead of comparing the male characters to you, I will compare them to any member of your choosing.
Time is slipping, Fun With Despair. You best get started.
Signed,
Seal
WHERE are your pornography reviews? Satan has risked his literal life two days in a row, giving himself GERD and tripling his A1C all the way to Post-Diabetes in the process to give us quality awful content, and yet you refuse to put your mind, dick, and prostate on the line in the same way. Do we need to enforce the Stir Rules and ban you until you start making content?
You see, your Garrison provides a very helpful resource for the community that I was looking forwards to. I need to know what pornography is good and which is bad so that I can impress my dates, and yet you keep holding out on us, and I keep looking like a fool and a CLOWN. How am I supposed to show them how cool I am if I can't even discuss the basics like what it means when someone's hips move on their own or what an ahegao is? Where else can I learn what terms like shooting ropes and squirting? How do I even use the eggplant and water emoji??? Where are the reviews????
I, and I would hope the rest of the community, am putting you on fucking notice right here. If you don't post any pornography reviews by the end of 2020, I am commandeering this Garrison, and not only will I step up my shitposting game and do it a hundred times better than you would, but I will also focus each review on comparing the male characters in each piece of pornography to you specifically and personally. And my first planned review is Sonichu.
The time is 10:30 Pacific Time on Monday, December 28th, 2020. Because I'm so nice, I'm going to give you the longest amount of time possible and time you based on Pacific New Year's. You have 3 Days, 1 Hour, and 30 Minutes until 2021, and 3 Days, 1 Hour, and 31 Minutes until my first article goes live and I begin accepting submissions as the new Gimmickeer. As an added incentive, if you publish your first review before the New Year, I will still publish my first review for Sonichu, but instead of comparing the male characters to you, I will compare them to any member of your choosing.
Time is slipping, Fun With Despair. You best get started.
Signed,
Seal
100% pure gamer 100%
