This post was last modified: Aug 30, 2017 at 3:30 AM by
Crash Bandicoot.
>I'm SO excited to set up for the OFFICIAL KILLING GAME FIGHTING GAME TOURNAMENT! A non-lethal way to satisfy everyone's violent urges! I head to the LOBBY and meet up with my counterpart who isn't making telling us apart hard at all BRAINMASTER. I take the ELEVATOR up as BRAINMASTER heads off to the WEST HALL. The MONOSHIKA STATUE's base is adorned with flowers. Aw.
>Gotta make posters for the event! I head to the OFFICE and grab some PAPER, MARKERS, and TAPE, putting 110% into making the best posters from the best poster: me.
>Take the ELEVATOR back downstairs and proudly display my work all across the LOBBY. DREI and LASSIE pass me by as they left the GIFT SHOP and headed UPSTAIRS. They didn't even ask about the tournament!
>I see AGASTYA enter from the WEST HALL and enter the CAFETERIA, and follow behind them. BRAINMASTER is there too, dressed in AIDAN's clothes... He pulls two SEVERED FEET out from a bag and throws them at us. BRAINMASTER heads into the KITCHEN after this.
>I start setting up the tournament as AGASTYA heads over to the WEST STAIRS, but not before imparting such wisdom on me like "DESPAIR DID KG6."
>The tournament is all set! Now to wait for competitors.
>BRAINMASTER is opponent number 1. His skill is... inhuman, much like the vibe he gives off near-constantly. After our match he heads to the LOBBY.
>From the PA I hear "IN THE NAME OF MONOKUMA I'LL PUNISH YOU!" Okay.
>Coming from the WEST STAIRS, TWO_FINGER is opponent number 2. I beat him, and in a show of absolute unsportsmanlike conduct he KNOCKS ME THE FUCK OUT.
>I wake up in SURGERY. TWO_FINGER tells me that he CUT OFF one of my arms and sewed it back on BACKWARDS. I look away and see AIDAN'S CORPSE, missing his ARMS and FEET. There are TWO LEFT ARMS on the floor.
>We both leave towards WEST STAIRS, he to head to the LABS, and I to go DOWNSTAIRS to pack up what was the 1st and last KILLING GAME FIGHTING GAME...
>I can't even fucking clean up after myself because I have TWO RIGHT ARMS, one of them limp like a wet noodle
>My darling friend SEAL comes from the WEST STAIRS and I politely ask for her assistance in packing up. She SLAPS me on the ass and says "No, I need to fix OBAMA's meat," before heading into the KITCHEN.
>At this point I've just given up, and decide to head to my ROOM. PEA is in the LOBBY, carrying a FUCKTON OF BOXES on a HANDTRUCK.
>When I get to my ROOM, TWO_FINGER is sneaking out of it. As I lay in bed, I head DOG NOISES over the PA.
>I go to sleep soon after.
I hope you're all happy.