This post was last modified: Mar 13, 2018 at 8:59 PM by Spooks?.

Well, uh... Tonight was interesting. Did you guys really have to go out of your way to ruin my CRAPS GAMES? For real, that's the one part of this game I HAVEN'T rigged, and yet you all still run around the areas like headless chickens with costumes and alcohol issues.

...Yeah...

Aaaanyway, in more important news, a BODY has been discovered! @Granny Betsy has been found in CATERING, badly burned, with signs of heavy blunt force to the facial area, as well as signs of extreme intoxication.

Her role was... A SECRET, because of tonight's SOLVE INCENTIVE, of course

If you solve the case, Granny Betsy will be brought back to life with the power of the NECRONOMICON, rejoining the game in the lynched killer's place.

case files
-CATERING has been burned to a crisp, the fire appearing to originate from the oven
-The oven contains a chunk of charred meat
-Bottles of JACK DANIELS are neatly arranged on the counter
-BURNED OIL coats the counters
-YELLOW SPRAY PAINT is splattered on a wall
-The KNIFE DRAWER is filled with yellow liquid, and several knives are missing
-There is a MATTRESS in the ballroom, along with a pillow
-There is a FAT PLAGUE DOCTOR standing among the slot machines in the CASINO
-The middle movie poster in the CASINO has cracks in the glass covering it
-The METAL GEAR SOLID 3 PACHINKO MACHINE has been smashed
-The PACHINKO HALLWAY has BAD ANIME DOODLES taped in places
-The EMERGENCY HALLWAY has the same doodles, as well as the word OVERTHINKING drawn on the wall in bright red.
-The words HADES FUCKS DEAD BODIES are drawn on the BEACH
-There is an immaculate statue of BILLY HERRINGTON on the beach, flashing a winning smile

other info
-RULES OF NATURE was playing from the CASINO
-A soggy note is taped to MAITRE D'EATH's door
-Some DEODORANT is missing from the BATHROOM
-Several COSTUMES were used tonight
-One or more players were AFK tonight

CURRENT MAP

CASINO PLAYERS
@Hades
@Maitre D'eath
@Shoey
@Producer
@Diantha
@Turb
@Martin Schulz
@Viridi
@Raptor
@Archer_Est
@"Barack Obama"
@London Tipton
@Blanc

The investigation will end at 4 PST tomorrow.

This post was last modified: Mar 13, 2018 at 8:14 PM by Yoshin.

ASS WE CAN
Sleep tight Aniki

This post was last modified: Mar 13, 2018 at 8:36 PM by Raptor.

(I'm a bit preoccupied with science so i can give more details and an account later, but I've got something to say that should help.)
Yo, What an exciting night, I got in my nightly exercise and won some competitions, as expected. But before I run off to smash Candyman in his asylum room there's something I wanted to mention. I feel like I got up fairly early and I went downstairs pretty fast, but when I got to the kitchen, that old lady was ALREADY DEAD. Or at least I think? She was just lying there in the kitchen.

Check for missing bottles of alcohol in Catering and the Tiki Bar

This post was last modified: Mar 14, 2018 at 12:39 AM by Blanc.

So Ram prank called me on my cell phone in the middle of the night, which scared the hell outta me. I stumbled out of bed and my bedsheet fell on over my hat, which was really awkward. I stumbled about and finally just gnawed some eyeholes through to be able to see at all. I'll have to teach her a lesson when I'm out of here.

Pissed off, I took my mattress with me, exiting my room. Spotting Viridi, who has the same appeals as I do, fastening a bedsheet around her shoulders like a strap. She seemed to be watching the bedrooms. Yrr came into the lounge and handed me a costume, which was pretty confusing considering Yrr isn't in this game. She entered a bedroom and I went on my way to the catwalk through the gym and media rooms.

Archer's in the staff hallway, and his lucky ass got a keycard. He locks himself in by swiping it through the reader, but then swipes it again and leaves. Looking down from the catwalk, Skinner and Chalmers are sitting at a table, discussing a steamed dish. Clams, perhaps. I needed to throw something to relieve my anger, so I threw my mattress down and smashed their table. Then I jumped down and landed on it.

They can't handle my mature charm and elegance as I head over to catering. It sounds like there's something or other about regional dialects. Inside the room, there's oil and yellow spray paint everywhere. Jeez. An old lady's lying face down on the floor in front of the oven, which is smoking heavily and burning inside. I uh, guess that's the dead body. A plague doctor stands next to her, motionless. I head over to stand near the door to the backstage to keep a lookout as planned, but then notice two mannequins naked next to a huge wardrobe inside. I turn back to the plague doctor and he bitchslaps me before heading into the casino. Okay, wise guy. If you wanna throw down, I've got a hammer with your name on it.

The oven soon erupts, spreading the flames throughout the room, and it starts to bother me heavily. Skinner walks in, yawning, then immediately exits. I head into the Casino and hear that one Aluminum Cog Lifting song. Donald Trump in a ballgown is standing atop a slot machine, locked in combat with the fucking Phantom Thief. Greaaaat. Trump has a katana, the Thief has a yellow knife. Producer, Monokuma, a fat Plague Doctor, London Tipton, and Maitre D'eath are all watching from their own areas of the casino. What a buncha loons this place is.

I see Producer had some nice lightning armor, must've picked that one up from that one dead chuuni. D'eath has a platter filled with beer.

Trump and the Phantom Thief jump up onto the craps table and fuck up Thunder Producer's game, and sync up with the choir of the song, clashing blades again. I say fuck it and leave as some dumb QTE starts. I always hated those, there's a reason why they don't make it into Lowee's titles. Going into the pachinko hall, London TIpton follows me, while Producer and D'eath head into Catering's blazing inferno. Too hot for me, this coat's bad enough as it is outside of Lowee's temperatures.

In the Pachinko Hall, Yrr's there again, with the MGS3 Pachinko Machine. I go through the elevator and see shitty anime scribbles and the words "overthinking" scrawled in lipstick. Come on, guys.

I head to bed and lay down on all that nothing to go to sleep. I should call Mina and have her deliver another mattress...

@Monokuma I'm going to lift the Plague Doctor costume off the fatty near the slot machines in the casino to inspect what's underneath it.

Check for missing bottles of alcohol in Catering and the Tiki Bar

You check CATERING for missing alcohol. There are four bottles of JACK DANIELS on the counter. Two are together, one is sitting about the width of ONE BOTTLE away from the other two, so you can deduce reasonably that out of the bottles laid on the counter, one is missing.

You have no idea how much alcohol the place started with, so beyond that JACK DANIELS, you cannot tell what was taken, if anything. Another bottle of JACK is lying next to the corpse though, empty.

In the TIKI BAR, there appears to be some missing alcohol from the stocks, gaps in the LIQUOR RACK, but you aren't sure what was taken.

alright fams a real tragedy happened on the 3rd so heres my story of how I'm honouring it:

so first I wake up, somehow at the exact same time as turb, what a coincidence. But man, oh god when I turned my head to the right. It's Shoey, in a thong. The definition in said thong was well it was a site to be seen. It was like a bag of tangerines. I was so disgusted I didnt even notice the rain, which puts a hamper on the plan. Which requires some planning, so I go to the beach house to draw up some ideas. I saw Skinner play with the sand castle like a bitch. After doing the plans I sat there and thought, "what pose would look good" I sat there for a while thinking. During the thinking I saw Producer enter the pool supplies and leave, and also Yrr showed up to give him 5. Weird. But this is a really important task I gots to do. I need the bucket and shovel for this so I go grab it, on the way I see Viridi but no time for chillin the important task must begin
BILLY HERRINGTON
With my tools in hand I start work on the giant Aniki. While working on the base end Trump runs by and up the fire escape. He comes back down later and runs to the supplies room and off to the lobby.
It's finished though, Billy Herrington in all his glory, to finalize it I have to treat the sand with chemicals to turn it to stone. Which I do. Then its off to bed for me as tomorrow is a big day.

-I wake up and leave my room to go to the tiki bar. It is raining. Shoey is there in a pink thong doing jumping jacks. Diantha is on the beach waiting.
-I pocket a fork and leave to pool supplies.
-I equip LEDs and a battery pack to create lightning armor.
-When I get outside I see Yrr with a soggy pillowcase. She high fives me and then attempts to punch me but decides she is too afraid. She then hands me a costume and heads off to the beach house.
-I pass through the pachinko hallway and into the casino. Maitre and London are there. I try to spend some star jewels for new idols at the craps table but it doesn't work.
-Plague doctor exits catering and heads over to the slot machines
-I play craps until Trump in a ballgown enters from the pachinko hallway and the phantom thief jumps out from behind a slot machine. The thief has a fancy coat, masquerade mask, and yellow knife.
-Trump leaps onto the slot machines and pulls out a katana. He duels with the phantom thief on top of there while rules of nature play. While this is happening a bedsheet ghost enters.
-Trump and masked person jump onto the craps table and knock over Monokuma, ending my game. I leave.
-I enter catering with Maitre as Chalmers leaves. Catering is on fire, Granny Betsy is dead, and there is yellow paint on the wall.
-I enter the ballroom and find a mattress on one of the tables, Viridi KO'd, and Principal Skinner on the ground rubbing his eyes while crying.
-I go to the buffet and eat some breakfast pizza.
-I return to my room noticing a sand Billy Herrington out on the beach

@Monokuma I'm going to lift the Plague Doctor costume off the fatty near the slot machines in the casino to inspect what's underneath it.

You lift up the PLAGUE DOCTOR COSTUME and see that it has been awkwardly fitted onto a SLOT MACHINE, giving it a strange, wide, fat appearance.

hot

Spent the whole night getting swole baby
Saw a few people but nothing that important

Spent the whole night getting swole baby
Saw a few people but nothing that important

Great account, dumbass.

ACCOUNT IN NOT SHITTY IMAGE FORMAT

Spoiler: Show

Well, that was an intriguing turn of events.

After hearing of the bear's gambling proposal, I came to the conclusion that it simply isn't gambling if you don't get yourself intoxicated. So, I headed to the catering section to grab a few beers.

I have to say, it was rather busy for the middle of the night! Most notably, alas, poor Granny Betsy, who was baking some cookies. I hope she finds Purgatory's cooking to her satisfaction, as one professional to another. I just hope she cuts back on the alcohol.

I supplied myself with a dish and some cold ones, and headed out to the casino to serve and observe. I must say, Mr. Monokuma, you should probably check people's ages before you start allowing them to gamble, as I was shocked to discover Ms. Tipton had been gambling.

Not long after I started waiting at the table, Mr. Chalmers joined us for a beer and, rather graphically, a masturbation session. I took no part, after all, as I am a professional. Bafflingly, the bear decided to award him with a keycard for his expert hand.

We were then joined by a man in rather garish lightning-themed armor, who also declined to take a beer. At this point, things get increasingly... radical.

A man in a rather dated costume enters the casino from the catering section, and decides to disguise a perfectly good slot machine with his costume!

I then, I must admit, lose track of him for a moment, but by then my attention was captured by the rather radiant Donald Trump in a ballgown, who then started fighting with an unknown thief, completely disrupting the lightning-armor-man's session of craps with the bear.

Seeing as the game had come to an end and that the fight between the masked thief and the president seems to be heading to a ridiculous, music-filled climax, I escort the man out via catering, passing Mr. Chalmers...

Only to discover that the poor lovable granny has passed away.

Spent the whole night getting swole baby
Saw a few people but nothing that important

Great account, dumbass.

Thanks spent hours on it

Well that old hag was useless anyways, though at least her body will be replinish the soil's nutrients.


What I'M interested in is exposing the killer, so the world can be rid of another one you scum! So here it is, the account of the great Viridi, goddess of nature!


I spent the first half of might of the night watching the bedrooms up stairs, that way I could get a good idea of what the killer did for the investigation, gotta wipe all of you out somehow!

-first off was that london tipton girl heading out into the hallway, didn't seem too suspicious!

-After that was the wonderful climate change-fighting president (dressed as a bedsheet ghost for some reason while clutching a pillowcase), leave his room and go into the hallway. Something's obviously off about that!

-Then I saw baseball boy/raptor/whatever-his-name-is leave his room and go into the gym, think that filthy human did some fucked up things as chalmers later but i'll get into THAT later!

-Awhile later, Archer left his room and used a key card slider to enter the catwalk! Where did he get this card for the slider? Why did he go to the catwalk?!? WHY DID HE USE A PLASTIC CARD THAT'S NOT ENVIRONMENTALLY FRIENDLY?!?!?!

-Then I saw a cute soggy deer named Yrr come upstairs holding a pillowcase! But at the same time ANOTHER bedsheet ghost left their room, (I was too busy looking at that ADORABLE animal to notice which one though.) Then the deer gave something to the bedsheet ghost and then that ghost then went into Obama's room and left said room again! Nothing else notable about those two except the deer went downstairs and the ghost went into the gym!


I went into the bathroom and grabbed an aerosol can of deo to defend myself from the underworld army and all of you human scum! Afterwards I went out and down the stairs into the pouring rain. The natural minerals in rainwater does SO many more wonders for hair then any shampoo made by man ever could! I tried giving a shovel and bucket to a certain someone who gave me quite a nasty look and did it herself since APPARENTLY I wasn't fast enough for her. Hmmf, the petty impatience of mortals!


Now THIS is where the vines really start growing!



First I grabbed an umbrella, and wrote on the lovely beach a message EXPOSING the sexually deviant crimes of Hades against the earth! Just as Diantha finished building an idol to a pornstar, pretty appropriate if I do say so myself! Then the booming voice of Hades rang out challenging me from the ballroom, so I rushed right over! Upon my glorious arrival I saw skinner and chalmers talking to each other.



Of course, Hades' terrible disguise couldnt fool me so I walked straight up to skinner/hades and sprayed the fuck outta his eyes with the deo, a perfect and fitting use for toxic chemicals! Score one for going green!


Unfortunately, that bastard Chalmers started beating me with a WOODEN baseball bat. Over and over until I was knocked out, can't believe someone found such a perverse way to use a tree! The human degenerate will pay for this!

Also, while on the beach, I saw trump in a filthy ballgown run up the fire escape, then back down into pool supplies, and then into the lobby. Bet he's planning on some new policy to harm the planet and promote climate change.

Daddy put me on an island with a bunch of sick freaks! You all have no idea how to coordinate outfits, I was totally traumatised! Oh, and I saw some murderer too.

At the start of the night, I wake up and check out my room for a bit, noticing theres tons of free make-up, though none of it is my colour. Stupid dumb Casino! I grab some of it and take it to the emergency hall, where I decide to practice my spelling of long intemelectual words. I get bored because thinking's not for rich people, and head to the elevator with someone wearing a horribly unfashionable bedsheet and holding a pillowcase. Polyester blend, more like Polyester bl-end your life!

Heading to the Casino, the unfashionable ghost person walks straight to Catering, and I try to see what all the fuss the poor people make about gambling is by sitting at the Craps table with that ugly bear. I get offered a cold beer from a walking skeleton butler! I knew Daddy worked people to the bone, but this is ridiculous! I shot him this look:



And the bear called him an idiot. I giggled. I win nothing from the table, and decide that the game's obviously rigged towards the less fortunate in life so they can feel accomplishment. At this point, Superintendent Chalmers walks out of Catering, and sits down at the Craps Table, where the skeleton offers him a drink too, and I decide to go to Catering to perk up my natural beauty with some light exotic cuisine.

That's when I see it!

Someone wearing a Plague Doctor costume is standing next to the corpse of that old hag, holding a knife aloft! The oven is on fire, and the plague doctor is spray-painting it bright yellow. I'm scared out of my wits, but steeling my strength, I yell BOO YOU! In the most non-terrified voice I can muster. Thinking back to the skeleton man's offer, I decide to grab a bottle of Jack Daniels from the kitchen for later because hell, I'll need it for what happens next.

The Producer man then starts playing Craps while dressed in Lightning Armor, and the Plague Doctor walks out of catering, removing his costume and dressing a slot machine with it. He's wearing a hideous mask and coat underneath, and he hides behind the slot machine he garbed his ugly costume with.

Suddenly, against the music from a broken pachinko machine, Donald Trump in a disgusting ballgown and the Masked Man (who was the plague doctor) begin to fight. Donald Trump unsheathes a katana, and duels the Masked Man, who is brandishing that same knife, except painted yellow. The ghost of beauty sleep's past comes in to watch as well. During their fight, they perform a bunch of weird moves and stop the Producer mid-Craps game. Watching the commoners fight is fun, but because of the costumes and references to some video game, this is me, the whole time I'm sitting there:



I decide that the polyester sheet ghost is the least offensive of the many horrific fashion faux pas' I've been made to witness this evening, and make him my bodyguard to accompany little me back to my suite. I notice a bunch of awful anime drawings in the Pachinko room, along with YRR tied to the broken MSG3 machine. The ghost and I head back to our rooms together, where I dream of money.

All in all, I'm left with one assumption!



Yay me for solving the case!

@Monokuma , would you care to shed some light on if the victim's blunt wound has, oh, I dunno, splinters in it?

@Monokuma