thats right. its here. the moment you all have been waiting for. or the moment you havent been waiting for that is just another minute of the day. your choice depending on if you signed up or not. ill bet youre real proud of yourself, sitting there all lazy. "i didnt have to make a gift", you say. ah yes, but you will not be receiving one then either. instead, the only thing you get is my disdain.

lets begin. @Yrrzy has gotten @junie like two gifts what the fuck.

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first off this thing. it is physical. it is a key. it is wood. it is probably good


"Memey Christmas Junie!
I got you a key you wanted for your keyboard, and also drew some characters you wanted to see smoking weed!
Hope you have a great time with it!"

and this shit too.

moving right along. @Demonlemon has prepared a picture for @Two_Finger. instead of being drawn, he is the one drawing. it is fascinating. im in as much shock as you all are. or perhaps that is my crippling nervous disability.

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"so I heard you like kino no tabi and souls games :D"

This post was last modified: Dec 25, 2021 at 8:44 PM by santa..

@Draku is a lazy bastard. he didnt put a single bit of work in. however he did pay money to "the steam". which is proud to present free games for steam. but only if other people buy them for you. how lucky for you, @Kright.

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it is a copy of touhou monster TD on steam. he says it seems to match your interests. if you do not like this game he will instead buy you a different game under $20 or provide an eshop/psn/whatever card. wow. options. deliver your steam address to him. or dont.

Just DM me your steam profile either on MW or Discord! Or your preference as to the other options.

This post was last modified: Dec 25, 2021 at 8:47 PM by santa..

@Pea is particularly lucky. he has been enjoying his gift from @junie for the entire month now. if he can read it.

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it is a japanese text biography of satoshi tajiri. i think hes the guy who invented bitcoin. or pokemon. one of the two.

@Superchao got @Fun With Despair some books as well. he on the other hand can't read them yet. unlike @Pea. you little shit.

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they are nero wolfe novels. some of them disappeared in the mail. but something will be there. eventually. superchao said so. i will hold him to it. he is so held to it that he is in my grasp, right now. i am breaking his bones. they are like little twigs

fwd is not getting Too Many Cooks or Three At Wolfe's Door. RIP.

however he is getting (and can open this if he wants)

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-Not Quite Dead Enough
-Murder By The Book
-Black Orchids
-Might As Well Be Dead
-And Four To Go

this is new. i appear to have assigned @Fun With Despair to get @Superchao a gift in return too. once he receives medical attention for his broken bones he can open it.

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"Behold... The Despaircrate™! Contained within are many strange things... Items you can only find in Canada... Things that only I like... and perhaps even... some sort of actual gifts too... who knows?

Well, Superchao will soon, when he receives this terrible item in the mail and is made sorely aware of the horrors contained within this mysterious box!

Ominously-lit Scooby-Doo pillow not included.

(To be honest I don't have much faith in the mail system with regards to this even being delivered thanks to the fact that the shipping label Canada Post gave me specifically seems to despise apartments, but it it doesn't come by like the end of January just hit me up and I will buy you a steam game)"

so both of them got each other and neither's gift made it to the other yet. i am now also breaking fwd's arms. he is being held

@Kright has drawn @Yrrzy a gift. it was originally a tumblr hotlink. i hope you did not post it early and spoil the fun. i will have to break more arms.

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@Pea is particularly lucky. he has been enjoying his gift from @junie for the entire month now. if he can read it.

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it is a japanese text biography of satoshi tajiri. i think hes the guy who invented bitcoin. or pokemon. one of the two.

are you FUCKING KIDDING ME

this is legitimately the best gift you could have gotten me, this owns so fucking much. im nominating this for goodest sh*t in mw awards 2022

thank you so much for this, i'll probably post pics in the discord

@Two_Finger had to make a gift for @Turb. he gave me this note.

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"welp I had intended to craft something but was stopped by self doubt and confusion at every turn, so instead I will provide a copy of Lost Ruins, a clunky but charming game. or your choice of something sub $20 on steam.
Merry Christmas."

i think he copied draku. to make sure this doesn't happen again i will break both of their legs, so i do not plagiarize my own earlier arm breaking work and look like a hypocrite.

@Pea got assigned to @sealelement. he bought seal the back 4 blood annual pass. correction. he did not do that. seal bought that.

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instead pea gave the gift of ""amid evil"". whatever that is. it sounds ominous. if there is witchcraft afoot in this forum i will have to take physical countermeasures. i better not see a single abracadabra or flippitydooda out of any of you shitheads. the fists will go flying. i will kill you all. in minebox.

oh and also this image.



the program crashed while he was making it. it must not like him very much. so this is all that is left. he says he likes it more this way. he is a weirdo.

@Amoeba was assigned to @Draku. she offers two things. meanwhile, draku only offered one. he is an inferior being who must be destroyed. or taught the meaning of christmas. i could do either.

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the first one is an art commission. it is late however. much like fun with superchao's mail box books. artists be like that. except for kright. kright was on time. so on time it was posted early.

the second is an apology for the lack of the art commission. it is a steam game of up to $20. there was going to be a neptunia game. draku is so stupid that he owns all of the neptunia games already. amoebas plan was foiled quickly. what is it going to be draku. choose. ""the steam"" is unending.

Aw, thank you Amoeba! I know that commissions take a good amount of time and you can't expect them to stick to a schedule. I imagine that was a decent amount of money already so you really don't need to worry about getting me something today. If you really do feel a need to, this would work since the other one was a fun time. But again only do it if you insist, I really don't mind the wait as I'm sure whatever you're getting will be great and again, I know how it is with commissions.

@sealelement got @Demonlemon. did she draw him? lets find out.

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she did. i have seen the work in progress. it is beautiful and festive. but it is not complete yet. so many things for me to hold others accountable to. all of the bones. shattered like dust in the wind. it will be posted here as soon as the final product is delivered.

This post was last modified: Dec 25, 2021 at 9:43 PM by santa..

@Turb made a picture for @Amoeba. it is beautiful. there are tears in my wintery eyes. the tears are now frozen. i now have ice in my eyes. it hurts. i cant close them. the eyeballs are becoming frostbitten. i will die soon. good thing this is the last gift other than seals and half of amoebas or that would be shitty timing. good luck to the next santa. but he will not be santa. he will just be santa

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Holy fuck since when could Turb draw. That's good shit right there.

Outside of mail problems, this exchange seemed to go smoothly! Glad to see another year of these go past. Always neat to see what everyone does. I hope Superchao reports on the Despaircrate when he can, I need to know what's inside.

@Kright has drawn @Yrrzy a gift. it was originally a tumblr hotlink. i hope you did not post it early and spoil the fun. i will have to break more arms.

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I love this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thank you so much i love your art im so happy about this

Thanks demonlemon!

ftr i opened my gift today because i respect the tradition of opening gifts on christmas day