Seduce the guard. Seduce ALL guards.

Take off shirt and reveal yet another, more seducing shirt.

This post was last modified: Aug 5, 2019 at 9:50 PM by Superchao.

>Seduce the guard

You take off your shirt and reveal your Seducing Shirt, flexing and showing off your goods. This successfully gets the first guard to stop short and agree to let you go. You have also accidentally seduced Tsubasa, who is currently following you around with a very interested look on her face.

Unfortunately, when you repeat this maneuver as you try to exit the mall, the guard there politely explains that while he appreciates your advances, he is only attracted to men, and would you please show him your recipe for all these items, ma'am?

"My... RECIPE, you say?"
crack open the cans of soup and beans you have into the empty pot and request a heat source

>Exploit the typo

The guard realizes what he just said by accident, but before he can do anything, you're already combining several items. Tsubasa, previously seduced, is happy to activate Ame-no-Habakiri and light her swords on blue fire for the purpose of cooking your food.

The resulting dish is a combination of six servings of different canned soup and two servings of baked beans. It doesn't look very appetizing, though it's probably edible at least.

Sob to gain attention and then surprise everyone with more soup.

This post was last modified: Aug 5, 2019 at 9:56 PM by Draku.

After sobbing, say "W-well I showed you my recipe, I'll be going now" Proceed to powerwalk with Tsubasa away from the guard while he is still too embarrassed from his mistake being exposed from the additional attention to come after you.

then fart

This post was last modified: Aug 6, 2019 at 1:26 AM by Superchao.

>Cry, powerwalk

You burst into tears, making everything really awkward for the guard. Too distracted to stop you by trying to calm you down, he ends up not checking your recipe OR your receipt, allowing you, Tsubasa, and the soup pot to escape the mall.

Tsubasa drapes an arm over your shoulder. "So what's next?"

>Fart

You don't do this.

say out loud "damn i didnt know you were gay, tsubasa san"

and then also say "y'know... I'm gay too. How about we marry?"

and then say hahaha, just kidding!

AND THEN SAY "unless...?"

THEN fart.

>Say all four of these things

"I thought you knew I was really gay for Kanade? But then she died." Tsubasa sighs.

At the offer, her face first lights up, then falls, then lights up when you "unless...?" her. "I mean... if you're offering, then sure! Let's do it! We can get Genjuro to officiate, and Maria can be my maid of honor, and-"

Congratulations, you are now engaged to marry Tsubasa! You should probably explain this to Miku at some point.

THEN PISS YOUR PANTS

eat the beans

Naruto run to Miku and flex muscles while shouting "legalize everything"

get some depends from the walgreens and put them on underneath hibiki's clothes, FULLY GUARDED FOR PISSING

okay then after that we ask our sugar mama tsubasa to pay for everything that we stole or took today

>Eat the beans

You get about one-tenth of the way into your soup and bean mix before you decide to stop eating it. It tastes disgusting. You can either discard it or keep it as a weapon.

>Naruto run to Miku

You naruto run back to Miku and flex at her, shouting "LEGALIZE EVERYTHING!" Miku salutes and says she will start running for Japanese office right now in order to ensure weed is legalized.

>Go buy depends and then ask for Tsubasa to pay off your debts

You attempt to buy them, but Walgreens is out of stock. A shame.

You then explain everything to Tsubasa and ask her to pay for it all. She nods and writes a check, going back into the mall and handing it to the security guard. Everything's taken care of!